Squiggler

New NFL Commissioner named ...

My son, a football expert, tells me that Roger Goodell is a good man who has been 2nd banana for a long time and deserves his shot. For me, if it doesn't have Chargers or Steelers in the headlines, I don't pay much attention.

Roger Goodell named new head of the NFL

By Pat Kirwan
NFL.com Senior Analyst

(Aug. 8, 2006) -- If it ain't broke, don't fix it! The NFL isn't perfect by any means, but when you stack it up against other professional sports or other businesses, it can hold its own and then some. Commissioner Paul Tagliabue has been the visionary and leader of this unprecedented run of success and by his side the whole time was his top assistant, Roger Goodell.

I've known Goodell since his days as an intern with the New York Jets. He has been involved in the inner workings of the league for such a long time that he finally deserves his shot to steer the ship. As one owner said to me, "He has the intellect to do this job."

With the labor settlement in place until at east 2008 and the network television deals in place until 2011, it's a good time to turn the focus toward other issues, like a team or two in the Los Angeles area. Goodell has been the point man on that project for the last few years and in my mind, it wouldn't be wise to switch gears in mid-stream.

Roger Goodell was the overwhelming favorite to be Paul Tagliabue's successor.

Many people think that the commissioner controls the league, but the reality is that he works for the 32 owners. There is no doubt in my mind that none of the other candidates would have had the time to catch up to where Goodell is with regard to his relationships with the 32 team owners. Can he get them to put their egos aside and think as one for the benefit of the league? It won't be easy, but his style and battle-tested relationships with many of them will serve him well.

Can he see the future of the game? Does he realize the unlimited potential of how this game can best be delivered via the media to the fans? Does he have the same passion for the grass-roots programs like youth football that Tagliabue had during his tenure? My experience with Goodell tells me that the answer is yes. One of the keys to this is that he will surround himself with people who get it. I have seen Goodell and Steve Bornstein, the man in charge of the NFL Media, leaving the NFL offices many times on their way to securing more opportunities for the NFL Network. Goodell is young enough to take on the rigors of the job and see it through. As another general manager said to me, "The new commissioner is at least a 10-year commitment and Goodell has the energy

I happened to be on a flight to Los Angeles a few years ago with him and     we talked football from airport to airport. He wants more football people around him and personally I think that's a good thing.

Will there be criticism of this appointment? Of course there will be. That's the nature of this business. But if the NFL owners hadn't voted Goodell into the top spot, their decision may well be questioned as the league moved on into 2007 and beyond. With Goodell, there will be some changes in the league office, which is only natural, and is probably a good thing. One other benefit is that he will always have the ability to call his mentor, Tagliabue, for advice, and no one can put a value on that relationship.

If the league was in bad shape. If the TV contracts weren't being maximized. If the players were set to strike and if the owners were at each other's throats, then it would have been time to go in a different direction. But in 2006, that is definitely not the case and that is why Roger Goodell was elected the NFL's fourth commissioner.

4-Time Iditarod Champion Dead at 51

With all the war and death surrounding us, it behooves us to take time out to think about a woman who defied the odds and won one of the toughest competitions man has designed. I really admired Susan Butcher. She was my type of feminist heroine. May she rest in peace and be remembered for her courage.

Four-Time Iditarod Champ Susan Butcher Dies at 51

Saturday, August    05, 2006
   

ANCHORAGE, Alaska — Four-time Iditarod champion Susan Butcher died Saturday in a Seattle hospital of complications from a recent bone marrow transplant, Sen. Ted Steven's office said. She was 51.

Butcher dominated the 1,100-mile sled dog race in the late 1980s

In 1986, she became the second woman to win the grueling race from Anchorage to Nome. She added victories in 1987, 1988 and 1990 and finished in the top four through 1993.

In 1979, Butcher helped drive the first sled-dog team to the 20,320-foot summit of Mount McKinley, the highest peak in North America.

Butcher ran her last Iditarod in 1994 when she decided to have children. She has two daughters, Tekla and Chisana, with her husband, attorney and musher David Monson.

Three years ago, when she was considering a comeback, doctors found Butcher had polycythemia vera, a rare disease that causes the bone marrow to produce excess blood.

Susan Butcher Wikipedia entry here.

Susan Butcher website here. The following was posted on her site:

Butcher loses cancer fight

IDITAROD LEGEND DIES: Four-time champion succumbs to leukemia at 51.

By CRAIG MEDRED
          Anchorage Daily News
          Published: August 6, 2006

Far from her Alaska home and the dogs she loved so much, four-time Iditarod champion Susan Butcher died Saturday in a Seattle hospital.

She was 51 years old and the mother of two young daughters. She had been waging a battle against leukemia for a year and a half, but sometimes not even the toughest warriors can win.

A child of the American upper middle class, she turned her back on the civilized world of Cambridge, Mass., to carve out a niche for herself and her beloved dogs in a cold, difficult corner of Bush Alaska.

Through her 20s and into her 30s, she lived an almost cloistered existence in the Interior with her life dedicated to one seemingly impossible goal, winning the Iditarod Trail Sled Dog Race. She spent days on end on the runners of a dog sled following huskies through the frozen taiga and barren wilderness north of Fairbanks.

"I like spending a lot of time alone,'' she told a writer for the Daily News' old Sunday magazine, We Alaskans,' in 1981.

She was then 27 years old and already an Iditarod contender, though it would still be five long and difficult years before the breakthrough Iditarod victory of 1986. By then, she had joined forces with Dave Monson, a one-time lawyer, a fellow dog musher and a soul mate.
Together, they would team to dominate the Iditarod. Butcher was the driving force behind their Trailbreaker Kennels and the face of the business. Monson was the organizer and administrator, the behind-the-scenes player who held everything together.

They were married in 1985. Butcher won the first of her four Iditarods the next year. She would go on to win three more in the next four years -- the most impressive string of victories in Iditarod history.

T-shirts soon proclaimed "Alaska: Where men are men and women win the Iditarod.''

By the time Butcher decided to retire from mushing to start a family almost a decade later, her athletic achievements were so well known they had almost become synonymous with the 49th state.

Alaskans who engaged in conversations with strangers while traveling outside the state would often be met with the refrain, "Oh Alaska, isn't that where that woman always wins the dog sled race?" "That woman" was Butcher, and though she eventually bowed out of the Iditarod competition, she never went far away from the race.

She continued to breed, raise, train and sell sled dogs to other mushers, and she regularly assisted various news organizations as a color-commentator and analyst covering the race. Even this March, though weak from chemotherapy treatments, she gritted out a trip to the Bush village of Ruby to work as an Iditarod checker signing dog teams in and out.

It was classic behavior from a woman who did not know the meaning of the word quit.

She was possessed of an indomitable spirit, and it was that which has made it so hard for so many to comprehend that the cancer claimed her.

"I think everyone felt like Susan was such a fighter in the Iditarod that, well, of course Susan Butcher is going to beat this,'' said Mark Nordman, the Iditarod race marshal and a friend. "That's how everyone felt.''

There was even a brief period when it looked obvious Butcher would beat the leukemia the way she used to beat one-time archrival Rick Swenson and all the other men of the Iditarod Trail.

"At the time she had the (bone-marrow) transplant, her leukemia was in remission,'' her Seattle physician, Dr. Jan Abkowitz, said Saturday. "She was feeling absolutely fine.''

The transplant took place May 16. About a month later, Butcher developed graft-versus-host disease in which the immune system from the bone marrow transplant begins attacking her organs. She was rushed from her Fairbanks home back to the University of Washington medical center.

Monson and the couple's two daughters, Tekla, 10, and Chisana, 5, returned to Seattle with her.

Doctors began aggressive treatments to try to stop transplanted bone-marrow cells from destroying Butcher's digestive tract. Monson reported that she was often in excruciating pain from the disease and the treatments but battled on.

Doctors eventually managed to turn back the GVHD with a combination of steroids and experimental drugs.

"Then to our dismay and surprise, about a week ago, when we did a routine bone marrow test, we found that her leukemia had come back," Abkowitz said.

Butcher was given a tough choice: go home and die or begin another round of painful and potentially deadly chemotherapy to drive the leukemia into remission in preparation for another bone-marrow transplant. Those who know Butcher say that choice was really no choice for a woman who'd spent her life going against the odds and beating them.

She resumed chemotherapy, but on Friday her condition worsened. She was moved into an intensive care unit. Monson was at her side, as he has always been for the past 21 years.

He was there when she died Saturday.

News of her death hit hard in Alaska, though it was not totally unexpected. Friend, fellow musher and cancer survivor DeeDee Jonrowe had gone to Seattle to see Butcher just weeks ago fearing it would be their last chance to talk. Others were well aware her condition was perilous.

Throughout her illness, Monson maintained a moving and forthright online journal to keep everyone up-to-date. It was often painfully honest about Butcher's condition as the cancer ravaged the body she once fought so hard to toughen.

In her competitive days, Butcher pushed herself harder than she ever pushed her dogs. There was never a musher more deserving of the honor of being considered "the toughest dog in the team.'' Everyone in and around the sport of long-distance mushing knew that.

"There are few still around that had the benefit of what we call 'The Butcher Years,' '' said musher Martin Buser of Big Lake, himself a four-time champ. "She was certainly an inspiration to all of us. She was certainly one of the forerunners of having dedicated her life to the sled dog, and because of that she was victorious so many times.''

Like others, Buser was having trouble grasping the reality of Butcher's passing.

"It's hard to believe,'' he said. "We don't feel any older than 10 or 15 Iditarods ago, but we are obviously all mortal."

News of Butcher's death was spreading rapidly through the tight-knit world of people involved in sled-dog sports on Saturday night thanks to modern telecommunications.

"Today is a very sad day for the Iditarod Trail Sled Dog Race, for all Alaskans, and for every person who has been touched by Susan Butcher,'' the Iditarod said in a message posted on the race Web site, www.iditarod.com. "She will be greatly missed."

Nordman was at Iditarod headquarters in Wasilla on Saturday evening making calls around the world to notify others of Butcher's death. It was not an easy thing to do, nor headquarters an easy place to be.

"Of course, the first thing you see is Susan and Joe (Redington Sr.) climbing Denali and the champion pictures and everything,'' Nordman said. "It's just sad. It's a part of history that has left us.

"It will take a little while for it all to soak in."

The late Joe Redington, the father of the Iditarod, climbed Mount McKinley with Butcher, legendary guide Ray Genet and photographer Rob Stapleton in 1979. Genet later froze to death near the summit of Mount Everest. Cancer got Redington in 1997, and now Butcher.

Nordman said she will be seriously missed as one of the greatest ambassadors of sled dog sports. Even long after retiring, he said, she remained the one about whom visitors to Iditarod headquarters always asked.

"She's left a mark on the sport for sure,'' he said. "On dog care, there was no one finer.

"We knew she was on the biggest battle imaginable, but I think it came as a surprise to everyone that it came especially when it did."

Daily News Outdoor editor Craig Medred can be reached at [email protected]. Megan Holland, Beth Bragg and The Associated Press contributed to this story.

Iditarod legacy
Susan Butcher was a four-time Iditarod champion who finished in the top 10 in all but two of her 17 races. Her fastest time was 10 days, 22 hours, 3 minutes in 1993.

          1978 19th
          1979 9th
          1980 5th
          1981 5th
          1982 2nd
          1983 9th
          1984 2nd
          1985 Scratch
          1986 1st
          1987 1st
          1988 1st
          1989 2nd
          1990 1st
          1991 3rd
          1992 2nd
          1993 4th
          1994 10th

2nd test dirty - Landis stripped

With sadness, I have to report that Floyd Landis will be stripped of his Tour de France title and has been kicked off his team for doping. Apparently, the second test also showed unnaturally high levels of testosterone. Whether it is really true or a set up, we will probably never know. There are two things that make it hard to accept these doping cases, and especially so in this one. First, how can any athlete be dumb enough to think he or she can get away with it in today's high tech world? Second, in the Landis case, why do the high levels of testosterone show up only in this one isolated test? This seems very strange to me and I'd like to hear what the doctors and scientists have to say. I admit I don't know much about male hormones, but I do know that with estrogen in women, it takes about a month for the body to eliminate all traces of estrogen enhancement therapy. How could his test the day before and the day after not show elevated levels? The tests were all done in France, which makes them even more suspicious. We all know how honest French judges are, right? Think figure skating, Olympics and the years they tried in vain to ruin Lance Armstrong.

Landis caught in doping war

By Julien Pretot

PARIS (Reuters) - Floyd Landis became the latest casualty in the war against doping after a second drugs sample confirmed a positive test for excessive amounts of the male sex hormone testosterone on the Tour de France.

He is now likely to become the first winner of the world's most famous cycling race to lose his title because of a positive dope test and he also faces a two-year ban.

A statement issued by the International Cycling Union (UCI) on Saturday said Landis's B sample taken after his win in the 17th stage on July 20 had confirmed a doping offence.

"For us, he cannot be the Tour de France winner anymore," Tour de France director Christian Prudhomme told Reuters from his holiday residence. "Technically we cannot say he has lost his title but he has soiled the yellow jersey."

Landis, who again denied ever taking drugs, was immediately   sacked by his Swiss team Phonak.

"Landis will be dismissed without notice for violating the   team's internal Code of Ethics," Phonak said in a statement.

"Landis will continue to have legal options to contest the findings. However, this will be his personal affair and the Phonak team will no longer be involved in that."

His Phonak team mate Bert Grabsch added: "This is a   catastrophe and huge disappointment for me and the whole team."

In a statement on his Web site the 30-year-old American   said he had never taken a banned substance.

PROCEDURE

"I have never taken any banned substance, including testosterone. I was the strongest man in the Tour de France, and that is why I am the champion," Landis said.    Continued ...

Was Landis juicing?

Is anyone surprised about this? You just knew it was coming as soon as an American won. Bill Quick is unsurprised too and Tom Maguire and his editorial board prefer to remain in denial. Tammy Bruce says it best: "I'll believe Landis until there is some secondary proof, or an admission. Until then, the French should go back to eating their cheese and lamenting their loss(es)."

Landis suspended for flunking drug test

By STEPHEN WILSON, AP Sports Writer

LONDON - Tainted at the start, the Tour de France may have been tainted at the finish, too. Floyd Landis' Tour de France victory was thrown into question Thursday when his team said he tested positive for high testosterone levels during stage 17, when the 30-year-old American champion began his stunning comeback with a gritty charge into the Alps.

The Phonak team suspended Landis, pending results of the backup "B" sample of his drug test. If Landis is found guilty, he could be stripped of the Tour title and fired from the team.

Landis denied cheating in a story posted on Sports Illustrated's Web site Thursday.

"No, c'mon man," he said when asked if he used some kind of testosterone patch to gain an advantage.

He added that he "can't be hopeful" that a second test will exonerate him. "I'm a realist," he said.

Elevated testosterone is common among pro cyclists, Landis told the magazine, and he is consulting with a Spanish doctor who has helped other riders clear their names. Landis also raised the possibility that a small amount of hormone he's been taking for a thyroid condition or the cortisone shots he gets for hip pain skewed the result.

Tiger back to his winning ways

Tiger Woods wins British Open

Tiger Woods of the United States smiles after a putt on the 2nd green during the final round of the British Open Golf Championship at the Royal Liverpool Golf Course in Hoylake, England Sunday July 23, 2006. Photograph by : AP Photo/Alastair Grant

 

Doug Ferguson, Associated Press
Published: Sunday, July 23, 2006

HOYLAKE, England -- Tiger Woods had an answer for everyone Sunday on another methodical march to victory in the British Open.

One month after missing the cut for the first time in a major, Woods was ruthless as ever on the brown-baked links of Royal Liverpool, making three straight birdies to turn away a spirited challenge by Chris DiMarco and win golf's oldest championship for the second straight year.

He closed with a 5-under 67 and became the first player since Tom Watson in 1982-83 to win consecutive titles.

Tiger Woods Wins British Open by Two Shots

Open-Tearful Woods thanks late father after Hoylake triumph


More pictures at Tiger's official web site HERE

Landis wins Tour de France

A new American sports hero!

The winner of the 93rd Tour de France, Floyd Landis of the US. (AP/Bas Czerwinski)

The winner of the 93rd Tour de France, Floyd Landis, toasts with a glass of champagne as he pedals during the final stage in Paris, Sunday. (AP/Alessandro Trovati)

 

 

Landis finishes in yellow.

At 30 years-old, the man hailing from the small town of Farmersville in Lancaster County, Pennsylvania, could well have another three or four Tours left in him, but much of that will depend on the results of his imminent hip replacement, with surgery expected some time this fall.

"I think this one should be dedicated to Andy Rihs, the boss of the team,"   said Landis.

"I'm a bit more relaxed [about the surgery] now with this victory. It would   have been much worse if I hadn't won the Tour because of an accident or whatever. I certainly know that I'll fight as long as it takes to come back next year, or the following year. Whatever it takes, I will do it to be here again, because it's a dream to me."

Standing on the Paris podium with his daughter Ryan, the final owner of the   maillot jaune couldn't have looked happier.

"From my perspective, we raced to win; as to how the race will be rated in   history, that is beyond my control," said Landis. "First of all, we raced conservatively, but then, because of the bad day I had, we had to completely change our approach. That's how I found out what I was able to do."

Why Americans are so good at winning the Tour de France

By  Chris Carmichael

Congratulation Floyd, you're a Tour de France Champion! For the eleventh time since 1986, the yellow jersey will be worn by an American rider on the Champs Elysees, which is absolutely astounding considering Americans only started racing the Tour in 1981. Of course, any country can produce a Tour champion, and two champions within a 20-year period could be a coincidence. But now, three American champions in 20 years has people asking: Why are American riders so successful at the Tour de France?

Ben Roethlisberger released from hospital, makes promise ...

"I recognize that I have a responsibility to safeguard my health in the offseason"

Good news for Pittsburgh fans, Ben Roethlisberger has been released from the hospital and vows to wear a helmet from now on!

"In the past few days, I have gained new perspective on life. By the grace of God, I am fortunate to be alive, surrounded by loved ones and lifted by the prayers and support of so many. I am sorry for any anxiety and concern my actions have caused others, specifically my family, the Steelers organization, my teammates and our fans.

"I recognize that I have a responsibility to safeguard my health in the offseason so I can continue to lead our team effectively. I never meant any harm to others nor to break any laws. I was confident in my ability to ride a motorcycle and simply believed such an accident would not happen to me. If I ever ride again, it certainly will be with a helmet.

"My deepest appreciation goes out to the Steelers organization and my teammates for the compassion they have shown me. The physicians and support staff at Mercy Hospital were simply amazing, and I will forever be grateful for their caring treatment.

"I want to assure everyone I am committed to a complete and timely recovery. I look forward to being at training camp in Latrobe and to winning football games this season."

VIDEO HERE Very interesting.

Congratulations Barbaro!

Edgar Prado aboard Barbaro wins the Kentucky Derby at Churchill Downs in Louisville, Ky., Saturday , May 6, 2006. (AP Photo/Amy Sancetta)

 

 

Via Forbes/AP

A hero and his horse won the Kentucky Derby on Saturday. Undefeated Barbaro stormed into the lead at the top of the stretch and won convincingly - by 6 1-2 lengths - to give trainer Michael Matz his first Derby victory and jockey Edgar Prado his first winning ride.

Matz' joyous day came nearly 17 years after he led three children to safety following the crash of United flight 232 from Denver to Chicago into an Iowa cornfield.

The two brothers and their sister are now grown and joined Matz in the grandstand at Churchill Downs, where they cheered the strapping bay colt onto his sixth consecutive win.

Given a masterful ride by Prado, Barbaro beat a full field of 20 3-year-olds - considered one of the toughest in years.

With Sinister Minister and Keyed Entry setting the pace, Barbaro settled in right behind and made his move around the far turn, just as he had in winning his first five races.

The Florida Derby winner, making his first start in five weeks, had plenty left in the tank to hold off Bluegrass Cat.

Steppenwolfer was third, and there was a dead heat for fourth between Brother Derek and Jazil.

Barbaro becomes the sixth undefeated winner, following Smarty Jones in 2004.

Sent off as the 6-1 second choice by the crowd of 157,536 - the second largest in Derby history - Barbaro covered the 1 1/4 miles in 2:01.36, well off Secretariat's record of 1:59 2/5 in 1973.

The son of Dynaformer, owned by Gretchen and Roy Jackson's Lael Farm, returned $14.20, $8 and $6. Bluegrass Cat, trained by Todd Pletcher, returned $28.40 and $15.40. Steppenwolfer paid $7.80 to show.

Sweetnorthernsaint, the surprise 5-1 favorite, finished seventh. Lawyer Ron finished 12th.

Barbaro overcame a scary start, when he stumbled briefly but quickly righted himself. By the first turn, he was racing among the leaders, and in perfect position to make his winning move.

"This is a very excellent horse," Prado said. "All the time he showed me the quality horse he is. ... Dreams come true."

Saying goodbye to a good man ...

I am not a golfer and I rarely watch golf on TV, but I do follow Tiger and cheer for him in the big tournaments. I first became aware of Tiger because of the love and respect that was evident between he and his father.  And that's what it was ... a love story of a father and his son. We have seen so many instances of parents trying to live vicariously through the talent or accomplishments of their offspring, but never did you get that from Earl Woods. He was a tough task master and Tiger is the living result. I would say that Earl Woods was a credit to fatherhood and those who want to know the secret to producing a champion should take a lesson from his book ... love, respect, discipline, and more love. Our thoughts and prayers go out to Tiger and his Mom.

Earl Woods
1932-2006

CYPRESS, Calif. (AP)—Earl Woods, who was more determined to raise a good son than a great golfer and became the architect and driving force behind Tiger Woods’ phenomenal career, died Wednesday morning at his home in Cypress, Calif. He was 74.

“My dad was my best friend and greatest role model, and I will miss him deeply,” Tiger Woods said on his Web site. “I’m overwhelmed when I think of all of the great things he accomplished in his life.

He was an amazing dad, coach, mentor, soldier, husband and friend. I wouldn’t be where I am today without him, and I’m honored to continue his legacy of sharing and caring.”

Earl Woods was more than a golf dad, more than a zealous father who lived vicariously through his son’s achievements.

He had played catcher for Kansas State, the first black to play baseball in the Big Eight Conference, and he had been a Green Beret for two tours in Vietnam.

But he felt his true purpose was to train Tiger, and he watched his son evolve into the dominant player of his time—the youngest player to win the career Grand Slam—and one of the most celebrated athletes in the world.

Don't mess with me either ...

I am a Jeff Gordon fan ... but even I wouldn't rub it in the face of a rabid Earnhart fan ... come on out here NBC and try your stupid SH!T with us ... see how far it gets you. While NBC is running around trying to prove how NASCAR fans (or those bigot Red State people) are racists and anti-everything, what does it really say about them? They are the part of the liberal MSM which in my eyes automatically makes them racist, anti-semite bigots. Go Jeff! Click HERE for full schedule for 2006. This week: Texas Motor Speedway

via Michelle Malkin

And from Daily Pundit, this is both maddening and so funny in a tongue in cheek kind of way, that I laughed out loud ...

Conspirators intend to disrupt NBC’s newsmaking, the network has learned.

NBC newsmagazine "Dateline" says it will send Muslims to the NASCAR event at Texas Motor Speedway this weekend, in an attempt to record discrimination or harassment.

“We’re always careful when we visit Texas,” said an NBC spokesperson who asked not to be named. “But we’re really nervous now we know they’re waiting for us.”

“I guess they aren’t satisfied that we were totally shut down last weekend at the Martinsville track. Now they’re going to strike at our ability to serve the public’s need to know,” she continued.

NBC developed its plans in conjunction with the Arab-American Anti-Discrimination Committee, and will also film at other sporting events, including football games, to explore issues such as discrimination in housing and employment.

”They're going to place people in a lot of situations, whether it's an airport, a school, or buying a house," said Laila Al-Qatami, a spokeswoman for the Arab-American Committee.

The first warning came from a caller to Fort Worth radio station KTFW, (“Country Gold Radio 92.1".) Identifying himself only as “Bob from Denton,” the caller used the code words “Southern Hospitality” to describe what his group was preparing for NBC and the Muslims.

NASCAR spokesman Ramsey Poston admitted he didn’t know how to stop the caller’s group. “We suspect they bought tickets like anybody else,” said Poston. “They’ll probably wear jeans, t-shirts, and ball caps, and mix in with the rest of the spectators.”

According to Texas Motor Speedway security, trouble for NBC could start as soon as the parking lot, where extremists posing as tailgaters may ambush the Muslims with a grill. “Steaks, chili, burgers, you name it we’ve seen it out there, said the Speedway’s security director. “Before you know it somebody's handed you a plate and a Dr. Pepper.”

The caller’s group says it hopes to show the visitors around the Speedway and will turn over their own highly-prized pit passes so the Muslims can see the cars up close and feel the energy of pro crews and drivers at work. “We’re all regulars,” ‘Bob’ told KTFW. “But the first time you walk around all them busy mechanics, and you see the equipment, and the cars comin’ and goin’, and the ground’s shakin’ under your feet, it’s really somethin!”

“It’s not just the Muslims that are afriad, it’s the NBC team too,” said NBC’s spokesperson. “After that caller said they might ‘extend Christian fellowship,’ we’re having a hard time finding anyone who works here willing to go down and face that kind of hostility.”

“It’s obvious they’re trying to destroy our programming,” she continued. “They want us to waste our time and money and come away looking like idiots.”